A Huge A-ha Moment

For some time already, I have stopped to identify with painful emotions and am using a couple of simple, but effective techniques not to get stuck with them but letting them flow (The Sedona Method, Emotional Freedom Technique, Inner Reconciliation, The Work etc.)

Lately, triggered by an episode of addictive behavior and the call for local artists to submit works to the yearly show as well as The 100 Artworks Challenge by Kellee Wynne Conrad, I was following the suggestion of Echhart Tolle to stay with the emotions that I'm feeling before indulging in addictive "coping mechanisms", to explore them.

And, only an hour ago, I realized that I have never tried to apply those techniques to boredom and abulia. Don't know, why that took me so long, but I'm over the Moon that I discovered this fact at least today. I'm sure it will change the rest of my life. :)

You know I'm always happy to hear from you, right?

Please, feel free to leave a comment here or on Facebook,
or contact me at ritajc(at)inbox(dot)lv

An Intense Week

The week started with a still inflamed jaw and my first therapy session.

I felt really tired after 2 and 1/2 hours of telling "my story" and crying, but the conversation really helped me to change the way I was looking at my situation.

On Tuesday, I started to work at a tailor's shop. It was more of a learning than working, but I managed not to ruin this top. :)

Needed 2 full working days though to sew it together the right way with 2 machines I had never touched before. :)

By the end of the week, it was pretty clear to me, that earning a living as a seamstress isn't for me.

But I learned a load over there and leaving the house every day worked for me in many other ways as well:

1. on most days, I walked to and from work and discovered lovely streets and beautiful trees on the way
2. I visited my mom twice on my way home, one of the times, I met my sister at my mom's as well
3. I started to get used to a new routine
4. I made some new acquaintances
5. the owner of the tailor's shop might appreciate my other services in the future
6. I found a shop that would be glad to sell my creations including paintings
7. I was feeling much less depressed than lately

Late on Saturday night I had a crying attack, when I stopped keeping me together and just let out all the stress.

But it wasn't too severe, and I even managed, somehow, to explain my condition to my youngest son, who came to me asking what happened. :)

Cool, right?

In addition, on Saturday night, I discovered the first decent job offering after months of searching.

I e-mailed my application right away not expecting to receive any answer sooner than on Monday, if any at all.

Today, the director/owner invited me to a job interview on Wednesday, although I had forgotten to attach my CV to the e-mail. :) YAY!

I really hope I get the job and it's really fulfilling, not only bringing in some money.

To see more inspiring creativity jump over to Creative Every Day

And you know I'm always happy to hear from you, right?

Please, feel free to leave a comment here or contact me at ritajc(at)inbox(dot)lv

Another Tough Week

Last week started out really nicely with great time spent with friends online and offline.

And I worked on this painting.

And I added something to my diary every day.

And, on Thursday, I found out, that I can get 10 sessions with a therapist for free and registered for the first one. And I experienced real support and understanding in the social services.

Besides, the same day, 3 employers invited me to an interview. Two of them wanted me to start working right away.

I really liked one of the tailor shops. But it's a new business, and the income is too insecure.

The third one is a supermarket with really long working days, but at least guarantied minimal wage. Now, I'm not sure, what to do...

In addition, a tooth started bothering me on Wednesday. It has been problematic for years, and, mostly, it stopped aching after a couple of days.

This time, it seems to be really bad. I don't have money for the dentist. But, if I don't get it fixed, I, most probably, can't start working anywhere...

That's why I loved working from home, as I could do it even being sick and in my PJs. But that's not an option for me any more I guess.

So, I'm feeling really powerless, trapped in my body and circumstances again...

And Robin Williams took his life on Monday...

Thank goodness for the great course with GP Walsh! It helps me to hang on. (BTW: I can still get you in for $97. Just let me know, OK?)

To see more inspiring creativity jump over to these sites

Paint Party Friday

Creative Every Day

And you know I'm always happy to hear from you, right?

Please, feel free to leave a comment here or contact me at ritajc(at)inbox(dot)lv

Feeling Down

During the last week, I have felt more and more depressed again.

First of all, it might be, because last of our rats died on July 31th and I was grieving (still am).

But my inability to earn decent income is pressing me down even more. Translation jobs are coming in slowly and are mostly very small.

Almost every day, I sent out my application to at least one employer, but none of them even invited me to an interview... Not that I wanted those underqualified jobs in the first place...

But, with every day without change, there is less and less hope in me...

Money is scarce, and the belief, that I'm actually living on the expense of my children makes me feel more and more like a useless burden to them...

When they were small, I felt like they needed me. Now, they might be better off without me...

Another thing, that depresses me, is the isolation. All my friends live abroad and so does half of my family. But the lives of my relatives, that still live here, are hard enough not to burden them with my heaviness...

This is not the inner state that makes me able to paint. I started and finished 3 more paintings, but was not happy with them, so, that's it for a while I guess.

For now, I'm barely keeping up with adding some paint to my diary pages like this, for instance.

To see more inspiring creativity jump over to these sites

Paint Party Friday

Creative Every Day

And you know I'm always happy to hear from you, right?

Please, feel free to leave a comment here or contact me at ritajc(at)inbox(dot)lv

Hibernating in Summer

The heat is gone. There were a couple of chill and rainy days, but, now, it's sunny and warm.

It would be nice to be outside, but... I'm mostly sitting inside reading or watching movies.

And dabbing or doodling over my diary pages now and than. From the finished spreads, this is my favorite so far.

Thank goodness for the need to walk our dog (although those walks turn out pretty stressful sometimes) and to buy groceries, or I might not leave the house for weeks.

Have sent my CV to at least 10 employers. One of them even invited me to an interview. After that - silence... Didn't like most of the vacancies anyway... But how to live and feed my 2 youngest kids and our 4 pets without money in this world? And how to feel worthwhile without anybody ready to reward my services?

Listed another of my works in my shop on redbubble.com. But what change does it make? Depressing...

To see more inspiring creativity jump over to these sites

Paint Party Friday

Creative Every Day

And you know I'm always happy to hear from you, right?

Please, feel free to leave a comment here or contact me at ritajc(at)inbox(dot)lv

Dabbing & Doodling

There is not much to show off. For the last 5-6 days, a heat wave is my main excuse. 

Temperatures next to +30C are really hard to bear here in the North. Thank goodness, it's starting to cover up and chill down today!

But I'm still playing in my diary at least a bit every day. This is the page finished today.

I'm not particularly happy with it, but I love, that after not touching any art supplies for almost a year, it all feels new to me again.

And I don't know, for how long I will do it in these old altered books, as the pages are definitely too fragile for my method of working in many layers and using a fair amount of water.

To see more inspiring creativity jump over to these sites

Paint Party Friday

Creative Every Day

And you know I'm always happy to hear from you, right?

Please, feel free to leave a comment here or contact me at ritajc(at)inbox(dot)lv

Nature Inspired

I'm still not creating much. Would have plenty of time for that: I still haven't found a day job and am not getting serious translation jobs lately.

But not being needed and payed for it makes me feel pretty depressed and not creative at all.

So, most of my time is spent with sleep, books and movies. Would love to knit, but my left hand isn't healed enough for that.

So, I'm still playing in my diary. This is the page finished last night.

It is even good enough for the Journal52 project, as this week's prompt is Nature Inspired. :) Many flowers are blooming here in Latvia right now. And I love them all!

It is all super simple, and I'm not very happy about that. So I feel a longing for getting my hand on a "real" painting rising again. We'll see, right? :)

To see more inspiring creativity jump over to these sites

Paint Party Friday

Creative Every Day

And you know I'm always happy to hear from you, right?

Please, feel free to leave a comment here or contact me at ritajc(at)inbox(dot)lv

Quiet Summer

As some of you might have noticed, I have neglected my blog for quite some time. What can I say? This summer has not been very creative for me to say the least.

For now, some beads and stones have occupied my studio table to take a bath in sun and moon light, while I figure out the right design for a custom necklace.

There are 3 paintings waiting to be continued and, eventually, finished (the image shows 2 of them). I really hope to get back to them after I finish a big translation project I'm working at right now.

How about you? How was this summer for you so far? Have you created something? Have you taken any courses?

You know I always love to hear from you, right?

Please, feel free to leave a comment here or contact me at ritajc(at)inbox(dot)lv

Struggling with Lack of Motivation - Wednesday Wisdom

Having more distinctions for your demotivation will help you to identify the real reasons for your unwillingness to commit to action, so that you can pick the right tools and strategies to get motivated again.                                         Cath Duncan


Read the whole article here


Many thanks to Stephanie for giving me a link to this blog!